inhuman

I
am
pretty
much
destroyed.

I told everyone that I was ok. I think that might be a lie. Truth is, I'm so upset, so very upset.
I wish that I could have prevented this somehow. Maybe I could have, maybe not. I guess it doesn't make a difference at this point.
I mean, I always wondered what it was like to be single again, it had been so long since I had been single at all. Ontop of sadness, is this fear, like I don't know what to do with myself, especially around guys. Its like, flirting a bit is ok, but then I just think of him.

Like when I'm busy, I'm ok, but as soon as my mind isn't occupied I just crumble. Like right now...I was ok most of the day but I got home from a study group and I saw that he had taken me out of his facebook page. It's sad that in this day and age facebook is involved in this but its true. I just...can't handle all the girls rushing to console him, his mother telling him to call and what is the scarist thing is the relationship status: single.

I kind of feel like a part of person right now...like I can just watch from the sidelines while life does its thing. I know that I have responsibilities, I have school work that I can't ignore, but I want to just drift. And I want a hug. And I want someone's shoulder to cry on, instead of my questionably clean blanket and tissues. I want to talk to my mom but I have nothing to say about it. And I am trying to convince myself that I'm too old to just call my mother and cry over the phone. Kind of expensive anyways.

Its like being in a pit. Its dark and scary and I know that eventually, someone is going to throw a rope down to me but how long until this proverbial rescue?

3 days?
9 weeks?

Who knows. Ihope sooner rather then later but right now I have to distract myself. I need my eyes to go back to their normal state before I can go get dinner. I don't really want my roommates to see how upset I actually am.

Peace folkies. I hope your weekend was better then mine.

I think I'm turing back into a twelve year old. No, seriously.

How did I come by this? I've ust noticed that my former loatheing of typing slang (i.e. - U, L8er, <3, Mah etc.) is starting to fail me. UGH. I started USING some of these THINGS that are destrying the english language. (Not like it ever made much sense anyway. Ask any ESL student).

Anyways according to the rate this happens at and my lack of updates, my next post will likely be something along the lines of:

"OMG sup? Guess Wut? i'm in <3 with Billy!!!!!11!1 LOLZCATZ!!"

Anyways.

I have currently been in the midst of a ...quarter life crisis(?)...well assuming I live to 80. But now it is all figured out. I'm going to be a respiratory therapist. *everyone cheers*

Also. I've been having an addiction to a new, strong nerd-crack: Dragonball Z.
I know. I know. "But your 20!"
Still the best show in the world. Seriously. Vegeta, You are awesome.

This has led to finding Chris Sabat and Sonny Strait on youtube. Damn. You guys are awesome, and suddenly voice acting seems like a good career path. Don't worry, I don't have a day-job to quit. (Ask me again in April.)

hehe. man. I love being a geek. ALSO:

I visited my sister in Edmonton over the long weekend and went shopping in Canada's largest mall. I finally got a vest. I've been lusting after vests for like a year but could never find a nice one. Ugh. Thank you Le Chatue. (It's not like I needed that 70 bucks for food or anything. heh.) I also got a nice blouse from Rickies because I need it for a formal thinger (hospital tour) tommorow.

Well I may have go over-board on the hospital tour outfit but meh. Every girl needs something classic looking right?

Song of the Day:

Stripped by Shiny Toy Guns
Deep and Beautiful and stuff. I can't get over this one, I love it...

ugh. well. I guess i should go. Its nearly 141am and still have like 4.5 chapters to read for my midterm tommorow. (damn you Comp 100, DAMN YOU!)


XOXO
~K

Last One I Promise.

I just found this, and it was disturbing. (Above.)

So yeah i cropped this from a blogger page. For some reason it was just creepy.

CHOOSE AN IDENTITY.

Thats like all over the internet, but really it makes me think of credit cards.

Whoa.

Anyways i really do need to sleep soon.

or play tetris.

whatever happends first.

~K

Holy Shitee.

Holy!! Two posts in one day!? Can I have a more EXCITING life?

(Probably not, but i can always lie!! )

But seriously.

i just cooked something tasty, which for me, a typical student, is a big deal. I guess thas why i feel i should tell the world. (Because the entire world read this blog. you should too.)

Now, if you where to see this taste food, you might think "Did that crazy girl with a wok just slay a cat?"
Its true. My new tasty food does in fact look kinda like dead cats and vomit. But it tasted really good. (Really!)

It was ground chicken, peas, BBQ sauce, Soy Sauce, Worchirshire, and spices. Oh. and cheese. Two types in fact!

But it was a little spicy, mostly due to the fact that i spilled my onion powder in it. It was also prime living conditions for extreme halophiles. (Thats biology-nerd speak for too salty.)
but still.
i feel frickin creative. i should be an iron chef...

I also explored my exteme-o-nerdy side. Because, I, like many other nerds of the world were waiting for the movie Bleach: Diamond Dust Rebellion to be subtitled in English.

It
Was
Glorious.

So if you are like me, (a nerd), go watch this movie. Its great.

In other news i Beat my high score in tetris.

i know.
my life is one of overcoming many challenges.

buhbye!!

~K

Well i suck.

yup. thats right.

I suck. Big time.

SO now that about 98758765786542 years have passed, shall i update??

Well...August was an interesting time. I went camping again but this time with my boyfriend and my dad and my two youngest sisters. It was a good time that like before was tainted with me haveing to go to work 5 days a week. (Doesnt the reality of that suck?) I also worked about 14 days with only one day off. not fun. (but the money was. For about a week then it went to school...) Anyways.

So now its September and ive just finsihed like a week or two of school. Its my third year of a Biology degree. Soooo its been kinda interesting.

Anyways. my Chemistry teacher show this to the class this morning, i thought it was hilarerious and tres educational:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j50ZssEojtM

i wish everything was this interesting. Im going to make everything a rap.
Minus Microbiology doesnt need it, because im genuinly interested in that.

Anyways now that im at school, im on my computer ALOT more. So hopefully i wont be a non-updating douche.

ANND its dinner time (whatever the hell i can find in my kitchen)

Song of the Day: Serenity by Godsmack.
-i love this song its just calming and ...i just love it ok?


buhbye.

Camping yo.

Well i know it looks like i haven't updated in a century and its true...

...but for good reason. I was on a camping trip. Well sort of. The lake i go to is about 15 mintues out of town so i actually was still going to work but yeah i had no computer time.

So here is a breakdown:

Days gone: 10
Number of deer spotted: 3
Number of times it took me to start the fire on my own: 4
Matchs wasted on above attemps: 7
Number of mosquiote bites: ~38
Coolers Drank: 15
Smores Eaten: 3
Thunderstorms weathered: 3

So it was an interesting and relaxing ten days despite having to go to work most days. I discovered that knowing how to start a fire 'in theory' doesn't help as much as on might think when starting a fire and that anything below 23.9% deet in a bug spray is a waste of my time. I got destroyed by the bugs if i didn't put on bug spray as was proved when me and a friend of mine set out to walk her dogs around the lake around Six o'clock. (For those of you who don't know this, its primetime for bug attacks.) i got about 15 or 20 bites on one arm/shoulder alone. I know, it sounds terrible but somehow even while i was scratching my arm with abandon, I had a really good time. I think that to really enjoy camping, you have to work fulltime before you go. I have to say that i have a new appreciation. The bottom line: I learned that Shop paper towel should never be used to start fires (the fumes make you gasp for oxygen in ways regular smoke never can,) smores are a wee bit overrated, and that going to the washroom in the middle of the night through the dark forest by yourself isn't (quite) the end of the world.
While camping I had time to do some much loved reading, which leads me to my next topic, a few must reads. The first is a book called A Thousand Splendid Suns. Now i'm not one for what i call 'reaility reads' (i'm much more of a sci-fi or fantasy girl myself) but i think i lot of people would benifit from reading this book. Its a story about two different girls growing up in afganistan. It was VERY well written and it really opened my eyes to some issues that i thought hadn't really been much of a problem since the turn of the century. I encourage everyone to rent it from the library to read. The second is an articale or two from the latest issue of Discover magazine. (I think it was the August issuse but i'm unsure.) Anyways, it had an special on the worlds oceans. It was really eye-opening finding out what we have been doing to our oceans. The articales delt with ocean acidifcation and garbage in the worlds oceans that have been collecting into huge patchs due to the oceans own currents. I never knew so much about this before but again its a serious issue that everyone should be informed of.

Song of the Day: Voodoo People (pendulem remix) by Prodigy.
-funky techno :P Great for driving and doing cardio!

Well its time for dinner (hotdogs) and to watch a few movies i rented before i get to bed.

TTYL

~K

So it begins...

Well, here it is. And let me tell you, it was really inevitable.

I am offically an internet junkie.

Name it and a probably have an account there.
For instance:

Facebook
Myspace
Devientart
youtube
etc etc...

i know for a fact that there is more then that, but they lie in more embaressing locations. (let me assure you that isn't anything like sexymennaked.com.)

So a wee bit about me.
I'm a university student, and really most typical. I'm not going to list my interestests for the sole reason that its cheesy and a little uninteresting, but i'll most likely address that at a later date.

But for now, ttyl, I have places to be and stuff to do. hah.

~buhbye